Congratulations on your upcoming wedding

Marrying in church is personal, meaningful and spiritual just as you want it to be. Churches are special and unique places to get married in - the prayers, promises and the whole service of celebration become part of your marriage, on the day itself and beyond.

We are delighted that you are considering getting married at St Mary's, Wargrave or St Peter's, Knowl Hill.

To help with your preparations, we have put together a list of elements to consider leading up to your big day.

To discuss your requirements further, please contact the office by or on 0118 940 2300. Alternatively, speak with the Vicar, John Cook.

Enquire about a Wedding Date

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  • Booking the Date

    Do this as soon as you can, so that we can book it in the church diary and with, where possible, a Clergy person to conduct the service.

    Unless there are very unusual circumstances, we can only agree to conduct a service for you if either one partner lives in the parish, or if you worship here regularly, and are on the Electoral Roll of the church.

    It is sometimes possible for us to conduct a wedding if either of you is divorced or has a former partner still living, and we will be happy to discuss this with you further.

  • Banns

    These will normally be called approximately in the month before the date of your wedding, usually on the 1st, 2nd and 3rd Sundays in the 9.45am service. If one of you lives in another parish, we shall need to know the name of that parish before Banns are called here.

    If one of you lives in another Parish, you must arrange for Banns to be called at the other church, which must be a Church of England. This must be done on 3 consecutive Sundays during the 3 months before your wedding, and you will have to bring a Certificate from the other parish to confirm that this has been done, before your wedding can legally take place.

  • Marriage Preparation Course

    We ask all couples thinking of getting married to undertake the Marriage Preparation Course. The course's aim is to allow you and your partner to talk openly with each other about five areas to help develop strong foundations for a lasting marriage:

    • Communication
    • Commitment
    • Resolving Conflict
    • Keeping Love Alive
    • Shared Goals & Values

    The course is designed by Nicky & Sila Lee, who will take you through each session via a short film. The content shown is to get you to think about each of the five discussion areas and then share your beliefs with your partner. You will not be asked to share in any group discussions, as the purpose of the course is to share privately what each of you hold dear.

    For more information please contact us or visit

    The Marriage Preparation Course

    You will also have the opportunity to meet the clergy team, and look at the Marriage service. This is also a good time to meet the person who will be conducting your wedding service.

    Do use the time before your Wedding Day to talk together about the things that will be important to each of you for your future lives together after the day itself. You are going to take your vows in the name of God - so you will perhaps be wondering what sort of God He is, and what relevance He has for your daily life.

  • Planning the Service

    The person conducting your service will arrange with you the order of your wedding service. You will need to choose 2 or 3 hymns and Bible readings, which you may wish to invite a friend or relative to read.  A date will also be arranged for a rehearsal - this is normally during the week before the wedding.

  • Video Recording

    If you wish to have video recording made of the service, you will be asked to complete a form asking you to agree to certain conditions. The form has to be countersigned by the person or representative of the firm making the recording.

  • Flowers & Confetti

    You may choose to have flowers in the church for your wedding. We are happy to provide you with a list of local suppliers that we work with or you can use our flower arrangers.  An additional fee will be payable.

    Flowers may be arranged in the Church the day before your wedding, just check with The Parish Office to ensure no services are taking place. If there is another wedding service taking place on the same day as yours, please ask the Parish Office to put you in touch with the other couple if you wish to discuss the possibility of sharing the flowers.

    Flowers can be located on the shelf behind the altar, using the brass vases provided or containers of your own choice. They may be in the colours to match your other flowers but should be left in place after your service. Feel free to arrange your flowers in pedestals, on windowsills, around the font and at the entrance. In addition, an arrangement may be placed on the table where the signing of the register takes place.

    Pedestals are available in the Church or you may bring your own. If using Church containers, you must provide your own oasis (water retaining foam). When arranging flowers in church, the wood must be protected from water wherever flowers and foliage. Please ensure you mop up any and spillages and clear up any debris. No flowers may be placed on the piano, in Lady Chapel’s altar or hung from the pillars as the Millennium banners are hanging on these. Pew ends arrangements may be hung from the pairs of “knobs using ribbon or fishing line, or by means of the central hook (in situ). No other means are permitted (e.g. nails or fixatives).

    Decorations may be placed on the lych gate using the nails provided. Please don’t use any additional nails or pins in the wood. If you wish to take flower arrangements (other than the altar flowers) to your reception, please speak to us about this in advance. Other than that, please make sure that flowers (other than the altar flowers) are removed by the Wednesday following the service.

    Confetti can be used after the service, however, your guests are asked to only throw bio-degradable types outside the lychgate on Mill Green, and not in the Churchyard itself.

  • Cost of a Church Wedding

    We understand that weddings can be costly, so to help you budget, please find an example of costs that would be associated to holding your wedding with us.  Some costs are compulsory, which are set by the Church of England and are to ensure that we can maintain essential services and ministries for the local community. This covers elements such as the legal fees too.  Other costs are optional depending on whether you choose or decline.


    Compulsory costs
    The legal fees which are the same for every church covers the cost of the vicar, the church, calling of the banns, marriage document, lighting and all administration. The cost for this is £567 if you are local to the parish. 

    If you are marrying away from your parish, your will need your banns read and certified in your home church(s) and will cost an additional £54, per church. 


    Optional extras
    There are other optional costs, which are solely set by yourself depending on your budget:-

    • Verger (required if over 10 people) - £65
    • Heating (recommended Oct - May inc.) - £200
    • Heating (Summer - optional) - £50
    • AV/Sound engineer* (if needed) - £65 - £90
    • Bell-ringers (except at St Peter's) - £240
    • Organist/use of organ - £150*
    • Copyright fee (if video) - £30

    Donations toward the Church's copyright licence always gratefully received
    * If your wedding is filmed, there can be additional costs for performing rights 

    See Church of England Parochial Fees 2023

    Wedding Requirements Form

    We will provide you with a summary of costs depending on what other optional services you decide upon. To help us summarise this for you, please complete the Wedding Requirements Form. Once we have received your form, we will create a summary quote. If you require any additional information, please do contact us.

  • The Order of Service (an example)

    The Order of Service will be required to be approved at least 6 weeks prior to your wedding


    The Entrance & Welcome

    A special moment for all is watching the bride walking down the aisle. This signifies the start of the marriage.

    Upon reaching the altar, the vicar will offer his warmest welcomes to all and a hymn may be sung. Following this, words to reflect on the purpose of marriage and God's love.


    The Preface

    The Preface is the introduction to the marriage. It identifies who this marriage is between and asks for God's blessing. It reminds us what marriage is and what it symbolises to one another and to God. The start of a life together in which both parties are consenting to share and be one.


    The Declaration

    The Declaration is where the bride and groom openly commit their love for one another and announce this to all in the presence of witnesses.

    The Vicar will start by asking all that are present if they know of any reason legally that the bride and groom are not permitted to marry. Following this, the vicar will then ask both the bride and groom independantly to confirm this and continues with asking each to agree to honour, protect and be faithful to each other. The response from each is "I will".

    Finally the Vicar turns to the congregation and asks that will they all also support and uphold them in their marriage, of which, the response "We will" is said by all.


    Readings

    There are often two readings during a marriage, one of which must be a Bible reading the other a poem, love letter or other significant words. Readings allow a personal touch to a marriage service, of which, should you require, we would be happy to advise you of popular verses.


    Sermon

    The Sermon given by the Vicar during the marriage will follow on from the Bible reading that you have chosen and will aim to provide guidance on your marriage under God's will.


    The Vows

    The vows and exchanging of rings is the symbol of the commitment that the bride and groom pledge to each other. Traditional words of in sickness and in health or for better or worse remind us that there are good and difficult times in marriages and by saying these words, each are agreeing God's holy law and making the vow to each other.

    Rings are exchanged as a sign of honour to each other, of which, the Vicar will then confirm that by giving and receiving of the rings the bride and groom are now husband and wife.


    The Blessing

    The Blessing is a time to reflect on the commitment that the bride and groom have just made to each other and if front of all present and God. The Vicar will offer the Blessing of Marriage through a prayer.


    Signing of the Registers

    The final part of a marriage is making it legal by the signing of the Marriage Document, which must be witnessed by two individuals. This often done away from the main church area either in a separate room or off to the side. Music is usually played or sung during this time.


    Final Prayers

    Once the Marriage Document has been signed and witnessed, all return to the main church for the final prayer offered by the Vicar to wish the new Mr & Mrs a strong and loving marriage, guided by the love of God always.


    Please Note: When creating your Order of Service, if you plan to print the hymns in it, you will need to reference our Copyright Number. This is a legal requirement.

  • Hymns & Bible Readings

    Hymns

    Choosing music for your wedding day is a very personal matter, and we very much want to help you to have the wedding that reflects what you feel, as you ask for God's blessing on your marriage.

    In choosing hymns, we find that three fit well with the structure of the service, although you can get by with only two. You should choose hymns with which are likely to be well known, or with well known tunes.

    For the opening hymn, choose something upbeat, encouraging people to worship God and thank Him. For example, Praise my soul the king of heaven, Morning has broken, To God be the Glory, For the beauty of the earth or Give me joy in my heart.

    For the second hymn, choose something more reflective and prayerful. it is good to ask God for his help, or to commit yourselves together in His love. For example, The Lord's my sepherd, Dear Lord and Father of mankind, Make me a channel of your Peace or Lead us heavenly father, lead us.

    For the final hymn, choose one that expresses both celebration, and commitment for the future. For example, Be thou my vision, Lord of all hopefulness, Guide me O thou great redeemer, Amazing grace or Shine, Jesus, shine.

    Please Note: When creating your Order of Service, if you plan to print the hymns in it, you will need to reference our Copyright Number. This is a legal requirement.


    Bible Readings

    For weddings that take place in a Church of England, there must be at least one reading from the Bible.

    Here are a few suggestions that you can consider:

    • Genesis 1: 26-28
    • Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8; 4: 9-12
    • Song of Solomon 2: 10-13; 8: 6-7
    • John 2: 1-11
    • Romans 8: 31-35, 37-39
    • 1 Corinthians 13
    • Ephesians 3: 14-end; 5: 21-end
    • Colossians 3: 12-17
    • 1 John 3: 18-end

    If you have other Bible readings in mind we would be happy to discuss your choices.

    Second Readings

    In addition, you may also like to choose a piece of prose, or a poem, but please check with the Vicar before making the final decision. Whilst we are happy to read your chosen passage in the service, you may also have a friend or relative you may wish to invite to read. If this is the case, we suggest they come to the rehearsal to run through the reading(s) if possible.

  • More Information...

    The Church of England has guidelines for who can be married in each church. Their website provides a very helpful guide on this. www.yourchurchwedding.org

    Although it is now legal for same-sex couples to marry in the UK, it is not legally possible for the Church of England to offer weddings to same-sex couples.

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